Brazilian sex motels – 10 things you should know.

Brazilian Motel A motel in Brazil is not quite the same as in, for example, the US. In Brazil, you go to a motel to have sex, or at least try…

When you come to Brazil, whether it’s on vacation, a business trip or other purposes, and no matter if you’re a man or a woman, there is always the possibility (chance, risk, call it what you want…) that you end up in a situation where you need a room for one, two or three hours. (for sex, what else? Nespresso? Yeah, right!)

So what do you do? If you’re in Rio de Janeiro, you might find a hotel that rents rooms by the hour, but a more obvious choice would be a motel, because that’s where people go to have sex around here.

OK, but how does it work? you might ask. Well, it’s really not that hard (which is not what I would want you to have to admit to the girl you just took there :)). Here are a few pointers for all you SINGLE, UNMARRIED people out there who are planning to come to Brazil at one point in their lives, with no intention whatsoever to cheat on their spouse or other people they have a relationship with.

Nothing better than to be informed, right?

  • Don’t pick a sex motel that looks cheap. If it looks cheap, it usually is, meaning that things might just not be as clean as you would like it. The more expensive ones usually are surprisingly clean. (see the links at the end of this post)
  • You don’t NEED to bring protection. It is usually available (sort of a room service thing.) at no extra charge. Of course this is for the normal stuff. you might find a kind of menu (like a mini bar list) where they offer various sex toys, gels and other stuff to “enhance the experience” and these, of course, are not free. I have serious doubts that any of those gels and oils really work, but that’s on a personal note.
  • motel3

    Luxurious motel room

    Most sex motels will have different kinds of rooms or suites, from basic to luxurious. Obviously the luxurious ones will take a bigger bite out of your budget.

  • For reasons of discretion, every room should have a separate garage box, from where you have access to the room. Just park your car inside, lock the door and enter the room.
  • Once inside the room pick up the phone and let the receptionist know that you are going to use the room. You don’t have to dial any number. The connection is automatic. While one of you is on the phone, the other one can already activate the sauna or the Jacuzzi (never a dull moment :) ). In case you can’t figure out how to operate these (or you have a hard time finding the porn channel on the TV), again, just pick up the phone and ask. That’s what the receptionist is there for.
  • After you did what you came to do (have sex, or just watch TV… right?), you once more pick up the phone and ask the receptionist to “fechar a conta” and someone will come to the room (very discretely. The person never enters the room) and receive your money. (yeah, I know, that phone is possibly the most important instrument in the room :))
  • Sometimes, paying with a card can be complicated because the wireless card reader doesn’t have a signal all the way to the room etc., so I strongly suggest that you have cash on you to pay the bill. You never know.
  • If you’re an adventurer and pick up someone from the sidewalk, make sure that your great looking woman isn’t a guy… Seriously… these guys are amazingly good at what they do.(dressing up as a woman)
  • Also make sure that your sex partner is of age. Unfortunately, many under-aged girls and boys are still forced to roam the streets of cities like Rio de Janeiro and sell their bodies to support their families or their own crack addiction. Please stay away as far as possible!!! If you get caught having sex with a minor in a motel, you will suffer dire consequences. You’ll end up in a Brazilian jail, which is already a frightening place, even known to be deadly for child molesters (most inmates have a woman, daughter or niece, so rapists and child molesters are very unpopular in there), and almost certainly your face will be shown on national TV as well.
  • If you come to Brazil as a couple though, I think it could be a great and fun idea, as well as an offbeat experience to try out a few of these motels. No kidding, it could give your sex life a boost.
Another way motels come in handy, is when you find yourself in a place you don’t know and you’re unable to find a pousada or hotel right away. A motel is safe, not too expensive AND has a private and closed parking. Especially when you’re traveling on a motorcycle, this can be a lifesaver. Only downside: sometimes, the neighbors keep you awake, but then there’s always the porn channel on TV.
Check out the websites of these three classy sex motels in Rio de Janeiro.
For addresses and  other information of the better motels all over Brazil: Click Here
Here’s another great post about “casual sex in Brazil” by Robert Shrader (@leavyrdailyhell)

Hope this was useful, or at least entertaining.

What about you? Did you ever end up in a Brazilian sex motel? Leave a comment and let me know… 

 

 

15 thoughts on “Brazilian sex motels – 10 things you should know.

  1. It seems love motels are popping up all over the place! I’m in South Korea like a couple of people above and there are entire districts full of em! Luxury ones have jacuzzi’s, Pool tables, Nintendo Wii’s, PS3′s. Its a pretty enjoyable experience! Are they all over the place in Brazil? Or are they in special places that you have to look for?

    • Hey Simon, thanks for stopping by. Yes these motels are all over the place. Unless it is really in the middle of nowhere, almost every small town or municipality will have its motel. The problem is, that privacy in Brazilian homes is an issue with many people living in the same house (and the walls are very thin), so especially the young people need a place to go to do their thing. In the big cities (Rio, São Paulo…) they are more “sophisticated” of course, but I haven’t seen any with WII or PS3′s… I’m sure as hell not going to play video-games when I take my girlfriend to a motel… :)
      Cheers and enjoy your stay in south Korea.

  2. Great article! Only thing you missed out is that often in Brazil it is the girl who takes the guy to a motel. If you’ve never been here, watch out! Brazilian women can be quite independent and aggressive.
    Still, I enjoyed your thoroughness and discretion. :) Good job!

  3. Great post and one that keeps us thinking, WTF I am here for or what are those rooms for? good they will not look for your passport when you check in, other hotels in Vietnam and Cambodia posts warnings like “Prostitutes” are not allowed! hahaha.

  4. Hahaha great post! Useful if I make it to the 2016 Olympics in Rio – although a mini-bar list for sex toys sounds like it could be a bit embarrassing! They have 여관 (yeo-gwan) “love motels” in South Korea, too, though they don’t appear to be as well-run as the ones you mention in Brazil.

    • Thx Tom… I’ve never been to S. Korea, so I have no clue as to whether the motels here are better run or not… I would sure love to hear about your experiences here in Brazil. I’ll try to stay alive until then :)

  5. Awesome article, you really covered all the angles.

    Have you ever heard of love hotels in cities like Tokyo? Another wild thing to try sometime..

    • Thank you… I just wanted to give some “hands on” information about something that is very common in Brazil, but not in other countries. Sometimes these motels get bad press, but overall I think they are doing a good job in Brazilian society.

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